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| Well, I'm in Oklahoma right now. Resting. Um, I got into an motorcycle accident a few days ago, and was unconscious for the better half of a day. Woke up in a hospital, scared shitless and didn't remember the events that took place to put me there.
Um.. shit. Its been a tough couple of days, but I'm resting and getting better. I have a mild concussion, and I scraped up the right side of my body pretty bad. I have a bit of trouble getting around, but nothing I can't handle. I'm thankful to be alive, I really am, and it put a lot of things into perspective. I woke up and missed a lot of you.
On a brighter note, I have a puppydog now. She is a longhaired dachshund, and her name is Hero (Much Ado About Nothing). Uh, I like her, she is amazing. On an even brighter note, I'm dating one of the sweetest girls in Oklahoma. She has been taking care of me.
Hope your all doing well, see you soon.
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| Was such a cool experience! However, Tech blew it, and OU stopped that shit in the ground. All the hype about Texas Tech and they played like a damn high school football team. Might as well not even showed up to play. Me and Chad rocked that 2% Red Raiders in that packed 81,000 seater of a stadium proud up until half. Fun stuff. But it sucks, we kinda watch Tech throw away the Heisman race, and the Big 12 championship. Way to go guys!!!
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| I want to hear it damnit. If you think you know me well enough to tell me I'm a bad person, then I want to hear it. As often as I'm told that I'm an asshole, a jackass, and a douchebag, I want to know if deep down, that I really am not a good guy. I want to hear it pretty badly. I don't want to fool myself by thinking I'm a good guy if that isn't the case. I hear it all the time, I tell myself all the time. Good guy.. Good guy.. Nice guy. What if that's not the truth? Be a friend and tell me.
I dunno. This time to myself really gets you thinking, which I believe is the point, but holy hell, so much time, so much peace of mind when your not surrounded by peers telling you how you should feel. I have been close to so many people in my life time. I have stayed up nights listening, and taking care of many of my friends because I wanted to make them smile. I've been there for a lot of people, and I pride myself on that, that I care, and that I have a good heart because people deserve to smile. And those people are the only ones I feel can judge me. When I die, I don't want a preacher. I want those people that I just talked about, the people that know me for who I am, to talk on my behalf. If you fully believe that you know me for me, then walk up there and talk.
I believe I'm a good person, and I believe that I have a good heart and that I put most people before myself. Joke, joke joke. I was selfless in that relationship just like I am in any other type of relationship that Im in. I gave, and I gave, and somehow I still ended up with the short end, how did that happen? How did I end up like that again, why is that fair? Selfless. I put up with some of the shitty bull shit you can, and I got dumped? What the hell happened there? I want a bush to talk to. Know what I mean? Moses got one. Even if it was one sentence, I'd be happy for some type of guidance, just to know I was doing something right because most days it feels like I'm paying for something I did.
I'm done rambling, but if you read this, and you know me. Then leave a comment saying I'm a jerk off and I probably deserve it. I'd be way more happier knowing that.
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| Ah.. I feel like a giddy school girl right now. I just signed with a big time agency in Houston, Tx.
No, I'm not moving there, but they find a lot of work here in Texas, LA, Louisiana, New Mexico, and North Carolina where there is a high demand for new actors for tv shows and movies. I'm so excited, I kinda feel like a lot of the hard work I've done is paying off. Which is good because for a while, it wasn't looking to good. So I'm on my way to making a name for myself, so keep your eyes open for the name Calbat. :)
I fixed some of the things pertaining to my last post. Sometimes, you just need to sit back, and grow up a bit before you can love somebody. And honestly, the key to a good relationship is loving that person's company, and not the idea of your relationship, if that makes any sense. I finally realized you just have to sit back for a second, and realize why you love being with somebody in the first place, its the key.
Um, I had no idea people still read, and it was mucho awesome to hear from you. It makes me smile :) Love you all, hope your doing well.
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| oh jesus.. when you get really bored, and you go back and check your xanga to find out that your in the same exact situation a year ago is really effin sad.
anyways, i kinda enjoy reading how i was doing at certain points in my life, even though people are over xanga, and have moved on to bigger and greater things in the blog world, i might try to update for myself, because i know nobody reads these things anymore.
uh, yup, ive been chasing a red headed chick for like 2 years now, finally dated her, and ended up in the same place i was in a year ago. everything got blamed on me, and she is doing a bit better than me in our profession. it kinda sucks that im a not a sexy red head with breast. it also kinda sucks that the break up of our relationship was put off on me, she said that after 2 years of going back and forth, she was just exhausted. honestly, that was kinda the last thing on my ind when i look at the last 2 years. sooo blah blah blah.
righteous. girls can be horrible, i just would like to go ahead and say it. most are selfish. but then again, i bet most guys are as well, i just feel like i stepped away from that a long time ago. but what can you do.
im out, lata | | |
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